


we've got a lot to learn, god knows we're worth it

by thekaidonovskys



Series: After the Drift [2]
Category: Pacific Rim (2013)
Genre: Awkward Conversations, First Kiss, M/M, Picking Fights, Tendo being a lil shit
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-07-27
Updated: 2014-07-27
Packaged: 2018-02-10 15:41:51
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,300
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/2030685
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/thekaidonovskys/pseuds/thekaidonovskys
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>“Hermann, you and I have lived off crossed wires and miscommunication for ten years, it’s not gonna go away that quickly. We just have to face up to it and, see, this is another reason why I’m really wanting to talk about everything before we do it. Because I’ve never predicted you right a day in my life, and that’s half the fun of you and me, but when it comes to a relationship it’s just asking for trouble.”</p>
            </blockquote>





	we've got a lot to learn, god knows we're worth it

**Author's Note:**

  * For [RoseAngel](https://archiveofourown.org/users/RoseAngel/gifts).



> Originally posted by Tumblr user thekaidonovskys

And because they are who they are, when it comes to their first kiss they just about bicker over it. 

It’s day two of the new world, as some overeager journalists are calling it. For Newt and Hermann, it’s day one of being a couple and not a lot has changed and that’s okay, that’s alright, they have spent ten years supposedly hating one another after all and now they’re a day into a relationship  _and_ they’ve got all the time in the world since it’s no longer, y’know,  _ending._

Which is all fine and good but Hermann really just wants to know when Newt’s going to hurry up and kiss him already.

Because it’s one thing to say they don’t need to rush - but they’ve already slept together  _twice._ And by slept, Hermann  _means_ slept, innocently the first night and innocent with intent the second. And while at least this morning they didn’t wake up and choose to pretend they didn’t see the truth in each other’s eyes - because the truth is out there, they’re  _together_ now - there’s still the matter of nothing else having come from it. 

And it’s not just that they’ve slept together. They’ve shared everything in the Drift, then talked out the important parts. They’ve decided to stay together, to work together. They haven’t left one another’s side in the past two days. Hermann has even started using those  _ridiculous_ pet names he’s been stifling for at least two years and now he’s regretting them, wanting to take them back because despite everything that’s happened Newt’s pretty much acting like their relationship doesn’t exist today and Hermann wants to scream. 

But he doesn’t scream. He does what he’s good at instead; he tries to get Newt to scream at him.

“I suppose your paperwork will all be shredded when we start clearing out the lab,” he says.

Newt doesn’t even look up. “Hm? Yeah, probably. Anything we need is on file, I can get it from Tendo, and there’s enough data on the Kaiju out there anyway.”

Hermann frowns. That’s not what he’s expected at all. “Well - yes, quite. And our new lab will absolutely require tape down the middle.”

“I didn’t expect otherwise. I’m sure I’ll still find some guts to work with of some species or another, and I wouldn’t put them on your side.”

“Good. Good. Your loud music will, of course, be forbidden.”

“Gotcha.”

What on  _earth_ is going on? 

Usually the music is enough to have Newt at least fire back something about the horrible noise of Hermann’s chalkboard, and the indication of shredding his reports should have had his hackles up at any suggestion that his work wasn’t important enough to be kept. But Newt’s just writing away, humming a little under his breath and Hermann wants to push it, hard, say one of the few things he knows will snap Newt right out of it and start a fucking  _war_ \- but he can’t. He can’t bring himself to do it. 

One more attempt, and he’s going to push it as far as he dares.

“I can only hope we don’t get stuck in a facility with more  _Kaiju groupies_.”

Newt  _laughs._ “I’ll make sure you’re not bombarded with kaiju talk. If it helps, you can definitely talk numbers at me. I’ll listen.”

Hermann stares for a solid ten seconds, then groans and lets his head drop to the desk. “Why are you choosing today of all days to  _not_ be insufferable?” he asks. 

He hears Newt’s chair roll back, and then footsteps. “Because,” Newt says, just in front of his desk, “I can tell you’re trying to pick a fight, and I’d really rather not. So do you want to tell me why?”

Hermann sighs. “Because… because it’s easier to yell things in the heat of the moment than ask them straight out and risk being hurt.”

“There we go,” Newt says softly, and one of his hands comes to rest on Hermann’s. “See, now we’re halfway there. Look at me?” Hermann does, and Newt smiles. “Now, what’s the other half? What are you so afraid to ask?”

Hermann chokes over a few words, then finally blurts it out. “Why haven’t you kissed me yet?”

Newt doesn’t even miss a beat. “That was going to be tonight’s deep and meaningful,” he says. “The past two nights have done us pretty well, so I thought tonight I’d start asking what kind of relationship you’re after - not in the kinky sense, at least not yet… or not at all, y’know, either way, cool as. But what kind of a partner you are and what you’re looking for and how much you want to be touched or kissed and all of that good stuff.”

“Are those not just things you…  _muddle_ your way through?”

Newt chuckles. “Maybe some people do… maybe most people do, actually, but it’s not my style. I like to know exactly what my partner wants, I don’t just want to throw something at them and then learn they don’t want it.”

“But you’ve - you have certainly touched me before. Taking my arm, holding my hand.”

“Yeah, yeah, that’s true, but those are things that can be done and were done outside of having a relationship. As soon as we hit couple status, it’s all about talking first and action later.”

“Even for something as simple as kissing?”

“Uh-huh. Some people don’t like it, you might’ve been one of them. And hey, consent is  _sexy_ , man. I want to know that you’re 100% into what’s happening because then that gives me confidence and confidence is also pretty damn sexy.”

“And what if I had kissed you before we had spoken about it?”

Newt’s smile is a bit more amused now. “Well I wouldn’t have complained,” he says. “But we both know that wasn’t actually going to happen. I’m the impulsive one, which is why you were waiting on me to do it.”

Hermann nods reluctantly. “You are more of a hedonist than I am, too.”

“Which is why it makes way more sense that you call the shots and set the pace, not me.”

It’s all right and logical and now Hermann feels like a fool. “I apologise,” he says as he reaches for his cane and stands. “I clearly haven’t thought this through and you know far better than I do about these things. I should have trusted you and not just presumed that something was wrong - and certainly not tried to pick a fight.” He sighs, and turns away. “I’m going to -“

Newt catches his hand and gently, so he doesn’t overbalance, tugs him back. “No running away, you,” he says. “Hermann, you and I have lived off crossed wires and miscommunication for ten years, it’s not gonna go away that quickly. We just have to face up to it and, see, this is another reason why I’m really wanting to talk about everything before we do it. Because I’ve never predicted you right a day in my life, and that’s half the fun of you and me, but when it comes to a relationship it’s just asking for trouble. So here’s my proposed rules; we talk about things, we don’t run away, we don’t presume and we trust that we’re both in this. Okay?”

Hermann nods. “Okay.”

“Good. Now -“ and here Newt looks a little awkward, letting go of Hermann’s hand. “Come and sit down,” he says, gesturing to the couch. “Let’s bump up a bit of tonight’s conversation.”

And Hermann’s surprised by how much the anticipation overrules the fear. 

“Alright,” Newt says when they’re sitting together, barely touching, looking at one another. “So I’m gonna say that kissing is a thing you want, then?”

“It is. It’s - certainly been awhile since I last kissed anybody, though. Does that -?”

“Hey, you and me both. All the action in this place happened on the Jaeger level, the scientists were kinda last resort.” Hermann smiles, knowing how true that is, and Newt returns it. “But when you say awhile, and… and when you say kissed…”

“In any manner, and… it must have been about six years.”

“ _Okay_ ,” Newt says, eyebrows raised. “We have totally different planes of  _awhile_ here.”

“When was the last time you kissed somebody?”

“Kissing as in proper, more than just a second, the kind that means something… two years, give or take. But kissing like a simple peck on the lips - couple of weeks ago?”

“Who?” Hermann asks, then immediately bites it back. “Not that it’s my place, of course you don’t have to -“

“Oh hush up, of course you can ask. And it was Tendo. We were just screwing around.”

“Has there ever been anything between you and Tendo?”

“You have the Drift memories, haven’t you checked?”

“No. Past partners is strictly your business. Have you?”

Newt shakes his head. “No, same logic. And no, nothing with Tendo. But enough about the past, this is about us. Anything you don’t like about the kissing process?”

Hermann thinks it over. “The only things I can think of are those that come from lack of technique, which I’m certain I’ll have myself. Just no dramatics.”

“Yeah, sounds good.” Newt puts his hand on Hermann’s knee and okay, that’s electric. “And you want me to take the lead, yeah?”

“Yeah.”

“Yeah,” Newt repeats. “Okay. So.”

“This is the part I wondered about. How do you transition from talking about kissing to doing it without awkwardness?”

“Oh see, you underestimate my powers of anti-awkwardness.”

“Astound me then.”

“Easy. I just do this.”

And Newt leans in and kisses him. 

Hermann’s not a romantic heart by nature. He certainly appreciates sentiment and, despite the curious questions of some of the people he’s known over the years, he’s neither asexual nor aromantic. But all the cliches about butterflies in the stomach and going lightheaded from something as simple as kissing have always stuck him as ridiculous and needlessly sappy. 

Apparently he’s been kissing the wrong people all these years.

Newt draws him in, draws all of Hermann’s being into the kiss and his lips are soft and there’s a tiny bit of stubble scratching against Hermann’s cheek and one of his hands is cupping the back of his neck and Hermann’s hands have found their way to Newt’s shoulders and none of this matters, none of this really registers, it’s nothing more than an outward narrative, an outward understanding that shows nothing of what’s really going on.

What’s really going on is that even the Drift didn’t feel this intimate. 

What’s really going on is that Hermann’s never been kissed so tenderly, and yet so possessively.

What’s really going on is that Hermann’s suddenly realising that there’s no turning back, that this has sealed the door and any chance of walking away from Newt is gone. 

And when they break apart, a little breathless and lips tingling, he sees it all in Newt’s eyes, and he focuses on the red ring around his iris, the one that matches Hermann’s own, and sees all the meaning in it and can’t handle it anymore so he closes his eyes and kisses Newt again and it soothes it all away even as the meaning grows. 

He’s spent ten years proving himself against this man, always trying to prove him wrong so he can be right, always at cross purposes and never on the same page, heaven  _forbid_.

And now he’s finding himself in him. 

They break for a second time and Hermann smiles, turns away a little, then puts his head on Newt’s shoulder. “Was that… was it okay?” he asks. “I know I’m rusty -“

“Oh man, if that’s you  _rusty_  then I can’t wait until you’re in peak condition. It was definitely okay. Very okay.”

“I’m glad.” Hermann lifts his head, looks at Newt again, and this time it doesn’t overwhelm him. “And since we’re in the spirit of being upfront, I want to do that a lot.”

“I can assure you, you won’t hear a single objection from me on that front. But - um, I was okay too, right?”

“Of course you were, love.”

Newt grins. “I’d wondered whether the pet names were coming back or not. Thought you might’ve changed your mind.”

“Certainly not. I’m about as ready to change my mind on that as I am to not kiss you again.”

Newt thinks that over, then nods. “That means you’re gonna kiss me again, right?”

Hermann does so, just to answer his question. Except this time they only get a few seconds and then there’s a terrifyingly familiar clicking noise from the doorway and they split apart, fast. “I owe you two,” Tendo says, and he’s grinning as he pockets his phone. “Seriously, thank you. I just won the betting pool.”

“You fucking  _would_ ,” Newt groans. “How many of you were in on it?”

“Everybody in control, Mako, Raleigh -“

“Raleigh barely knows us!”

“You don’t have to know you two to know what unresolved sexual tension looks like. Anyway, paperwork for you two.” He puts it on the edge of Hermann’s desk, then backs off to the door again, where he just keeps grinning at them. “I’ll tell Raleigh not to expect it anytime soon. You look like you have more important things to be getting on with.”

“Fuck off, man.”

“I’m gone.” Tendo salutes, then disappears. They can hear his laughter echoing down the hallway. 

“The sooner we get to Geneva the better,” Hermann says. “At least we’ll have some peace and quiet.”

“You mean with tape down the middle of the room and no music and none of my reports and definitely no Kaiju groupies?”

“You know full well I didn’t -“

Newt kisses him and Hermann allows himself to be silenced. He much prefers this.

**Author's Note:**

> Such beautiful dorks. 
> 
> Title from "I Won't Give Up".


End file.
